Is it normal for my toddler to struggle with transitions?
Learn how to help your toddler go from one thing to the next during their everyday routine.
Transitions are notoriously difficult for toddlers, so if your child is struggling, you are not alone! Toddlers don’t like to stop one thing and go to the next thing, especially when they are doing something they really enjoy.
However, transitions naturally happen a *lot* during your child’s daily routine. For example, transitions occur when going from larger sections of your day (like play to mealtime) or within steps of one routine (such as moving from potty to brushing teeth within the bedtime routine). If you think about it, getting through an entire day is really just a long set of transitions!
The best thing that you can do to help mitigate the struggle is to warn them in advance that a transition is coming up.
Here are two ways to try that:
Tell your child out loud what is coming next. “In one minute, we’re going to leave the park, walk home, and have lunch.” Try to get in the habit of doing this frequently throughout the day, so it just becomes your norm. Remember, don’t ask your child if they’d like to leave the park - tell them. Following consistent daily routines can help overall because they start to learn what steps come before others. Remember, young children don’t like surprises!
Set a visual timer in advance of a transition. This helps your child know what’s coming up next by allowing them to “see” how much time is left before the transition. You don’t need to use a timer with every single transition throughout the day, but it can definitely help with any big ones.
Here is how to use a timer as part of your child’s routine:
Show your child the timer and how long you’re setting it for (even better, have them push the button!) - ie. “We have two more minutes to play, and then it’s time to go get dressed.”
When the timer goes off, have your child help you turn it off and put it away - “The timer went off! Come help me put it on the table.”
Swiftly follow-through with the transition - “It’s time to go get dressed! Let’s walk into your room.”
Give lots of praise - “Great job stopping your play and coming into your bedroom! I’m so proud of you for following the timer.”
*One note - some children can get fixated on the timer itself, especially at first. Observe your child and determine how much emphasis to put on the timer itself. If they choose to stop playing and simply watch the timer for the full two minutes, that’s okay, too!
Using a tangible timer (rather than your phone) is preferable, especially in the toddler and preschooler years. My FAVORITE visual timer is the Time Timer, particularly the MOD timer for use at home. Old-school sand timers and kitchen timers work well, too!
Want to learn more about how to help your child get through parts of their daily routine? Check out my Comprehensive Routine Guides - one guide for each age and stage, from 0-5 years. Each Guide goes into detail about each aspect of their day (sleep, mealtimes, play, mornings, and more!) to help make both of your days easier.